muddling all those mojitos, caipirinhas, Caipiroskas, or what have you can get a tad tedious. especially when your friends come over and all want a drink at the same time. as staples would say hit the easy button, oh god kill me for reciting corporate tag lines. but pitcher drinks are soooo easy. you can spend time actually talking to your guests instead of your muddler! this recipe here’s a cinch—just right to make in a pinch…

oh, wait, did i almost forget to convey the irrefutable fact that blueberry is ruled by jupiter, ruler of sagittarius? my, that would have been a travesty… cheers sagittarius!

PIE HOLE:
one 16 pz can blueberry pie filling
1/4 tsp lemon cooking oil
4 cups vodka
cream soda

stir ingredients well, except for the cream soda, in a pitcher. pack glass with ice, fill half with mixture. top with cream soda and stir. serve with a fork.

i’m sad to say goodbye to MOD magazine, who will be closing their doors come 2010. it’s been a good run!

sagittarius is not usually known for her psychic abilities, but psychic abilities she has none the less. no… i usually prattle on about her hedonistic, fun loving, generous, frank, outgoing nature, and if i do mention expansive, it’s in the capacity of travel. but, expansiveness is actually a trait manifested on many levels in sagittarius. such as physically, like gaining weight, or as in journeying somewhere on earth. but this expansiveness can also pertain to a mental, emotional, Psychological, metaphysical, and spiritual quality that sag does indeed possess. she’s quite capable of astral travel, if only she’d put her mind to it. and often, her sense of just knowing on a gut level inspires many of us to wish we were sagittarius ourselves. our lady of guadalupe is famous for her december 12th appearance as an apparition to st Saint Juan Diego. that particular image is still around today, located on that peasant’s cloak on display in Basilica of Guadalupe in Mexico City.

while the famous mexican cerveza cocktail, the MICHELADA, is made with saturn’s lime and mar’s hot sauce, it is obviously sagittarius’s lady of guadalupe who is enjoying it here! so happy cinco de mayo to this special woman, whose alter is on display at COMIDA in nyc. come check her out and experience a MICHELADA first hand…

MICHELADA:

Fill glass with ice and add:
1/2 ounce valentina sauce
1/2 ounce maggi sauce
1 ounce fresh lime juice
top with mexican beer

garnish: chipotle salt with slice of lime
***chipotle salt is a blend of kosher salt and chipotle powder. it has a nice smoky, and subtly spicy flavor.

my dad is the king of ice cream sodas. his uncle was a soda jerk and operated his own parlor in new york city which served this now famous kaiser treat. upon hearing that i intended to post his recipe, with added alcohol, on my blog got my dad slightly irritated. there was no way in hell his daughter was going to bastardize his secret recipe by adding vodka. in fact, he refused to make me one if i did so. stubborn insane aquarius that he is, i knew he meant it. my illicit vodka had to be added in secret. i ran into my kitchen, and added the vodka to the finished product, which did get a little messy, stirring with all that whipped cream all ready on it. i therefore recommend adding the vodka in the initial stages, all though i have not actually tested how it effects the carbonation. somebody wouldn’t let me, but i highly suggest you do just that the next time you find yourself wanting to be a soda jerk. the vodka gave an extra kick to an all ready out of this world treat. in the same way that a brandied chocolate covered cherry beats the hell out of a regular one, so does this bevvie beat the hell out of dad’s old fashioned version. i’ll not drink a virgin ice cream soda again. sorry dad, oh and thanks for the recipe!

this obscenely decadent snack could only belong to one sign, and that is Sagittarius, the zodiacal hedon. savorer of the whole pint of ben and jerrys. drinker of the whole pitcher of frozen margaritas. eater of all the leftover birthday cake. polite acceptor of second helpings. Sagittarius knows no bounds and her generous below offering super cedes any level of decadence you think you may have known. taste this, and taste gluttony’s broken sin.

NAUGHTY ICE CREAM SODA
vanilla organic icecream
chocolate syrup
fresh organic whipped cream*
seltzer
cherry*
organic whole milk
oh, and vodka

NO COOL WHIP: make fresh whipped cream by adding 1 cup cream to mixing bowl and beating on high until stiff. add sugar to taste. be sure not to over-whip or you will have made butter! you can also beat by hand using a whisk.

CHERRIES: i don’t feel cadmium red dye #9. trader joe has some really great sour morello cherries, or i hear brandied cherries are easy to make. (ashamed to say i’ve not made them).

start with whole milk. of course organic is recommended as there is no RBGH3 growth hormone in it. better for the cows, and better for moo.

add chocolate syrup. dad says be sure that too much milk will flatten the carbonation so BE CAREFUL : )

stir very well with a long-handled spoon or bar spoon.

add more soda and stir again.

add yet MORE seltzer and stir again.

add 2-3 scoops of icecream. again, organic is best cuz there’s no RGBH3 growth hormone.

at this point things will start to get messy so be sure to have RECYCLED MARCAL napkins on hand!

perhaps a little too messy.

/> pop a cherry on that baby and enjoy!

blair (a taurus) over at TRADER TIKI is hosting MIXOLOGY MONDAY this month and his chosen theme is rum, as in yum. who doesn’t like this easy going spirit? i’m not big into classic cocktails – i always try and tweak a tipple to make it new. but, with the pina colada… no can do! i tried ginger, i tried mint… a GINGER MINT PINA COLADA sounds good no? not so much. so without further ado, i present you with the tried and true PINA COLADA. this is one classic best left alone… if you are feeling creative, i’d advise using infused rum with perhaps orange, banana, coconut or pineapple. stick with the tamer flavors, and definitely stay away from the chili pepper.

the pina colada is usually served in a fishbowl sized goblet, perhaps because it is half filled with water (ice). it is so often presented in a larger than life manner with some lovely garnish (sorry). fitting, because the PINEAPPLE belongs to the largest planet in our solar system, jupiter, who rules over the larger than life sign of sagittarius. see, it all makes sense now! actually, the PINEAPPLE is technically made up of many, many small spirally arranged fruits that all join together on a single core to make what we know as the pineapple. that interesting feature is also a jupiterian quality… multiples… spreading… expansion… wealth… knowledge… luck… all traits of this hugely benefic and fun-loving sign. it’s not a party until sagittarius gets there. (credit)

PINA COLADA

1 C COCONUT CREAM OR MILK
1 C PINEAPPLE JUICE
1/2 DARK RUM
4 TBSP RAW ORGANIC SUGAR
8-10 ICE CUBES

LIQUIFY ALL IN BLENDER AND ENJOY

MIXOLOGY MONDAY

The pineapple is a fruit of Jupiter due to it’s rather gargantuan size. It can be argued that there is some Arian energy in it as well due to the sharp leaves that make up it’s top. It also happens to looooove water, which is a trait of cancer. it’s so hard to assign just one astrological ruler to a plant! for like ourselves, they are complex. we are so much more than our sun sign…

It’s also interesting that this fruit is a symbol of hospitality, for Sagittarians are known for their open arms and generous spirit. Royalty is also is also included in the story of pineapple symbolism, and Sagittarians are a magestic sign as well. Leo might be king, but Sagittarius is a big part of the royal family. treat the Sag girl in your life like nobility and serve her a beautifully layered IPANEMA. they do taste as good as they look, so don’t forget to make a few for yourself too…

IPANEMA (AS IN THE GIRL FROM)

1 1/2 oz Cachacha
2 oz freshly extracted pineapple juice
1/2 oz freshly squeezed lemon juice
1 oz raw simple syrup
1/2 oz homemade grenadine***
Garnish: 3 pomegranate seeds

Combine Cachacha, pineapple juice, lemon juice, simple syrup in a cocktail shaker with ice. Shake and strain into frozen cocktail glass. Gently top with homemade grenadine, which will sink to the bottom creating a beautiful sunset affect. Garnish with a pineapple leaf, pomegranate peel or float three pomegranate seeds on top. (Cocktail by Gwen; Photo by Mary Claire Miraldi)

***To make homemade grenadine syrup, add the seeds from 1 pomegranate to 1 cup water and 1 cup sugar in sauce pot. Bring to boil, stir and allow to simmer for 30 minutes. Strain into final storage container, adding 1 oz vodka as a preservative. Store in fridge.

this spring, i do sincerely wish you’d run outside to the nearest forest and plucked new growth from all the fir trees you could get your greedy little hands on. if you had, you’d have some nicely dried fir tips now with which to brew fir tip tea, with which to mix fir teanis. what? you didn’t?! ok, ok, lucky for you there’s another way… lazy ass fir tip collectors can buy their way to fir tip tea. gotta love capitalism. it is really delicious fir tip tea, too, mind you. (juniperridge.com.) now that you have the precious elixer, brew some and chill it. this is a really tasty tipple; one of my faves.

but who will take libational ownership of this concoction that pushes culinary bounderies? sagittarius, pusher of the all-mighty envelope! for, the douglas fir is huge tree, and jupiter is the planet of all things huge. just think about the thick floor of fallen pine needles, or the plentiful pine cones dripping from this tree’s brances. this baby wants to spread its’ seed–jupiter is prolific. this cocktail is a gift from, and for, sagittarius. and for a fiery, optimistic sign like this, hell won’t freeze over for long, so get one while you can:

HELL FROZE OVER (DOUGLAS FIR TIP TEANI)

1 oz raw simple syrup*
1/2 fresh squeezed lemon juice
2 oz Douglas Fir Tea*
2 oz vodka
candied ginger for garnish

add all ingredients to ice-filled cocktail shaker and shake for ten seconds. Strain into martini glass. Garnish with either a small evergreen branch or a piece of candied ginger.

* Making simple syrup with unprocessed sugar gives a rounder sweetness to simple syrup. In airtight container mix 1 c sugar and 2 c water. Shake every twenty minutes or so until completely dissolved.

brew tea and allow to steep for ten minutes as you would a regular cup of tea. Do not add milk or sugar. Chill in fridge until ready to use.

check out this wild recipe for a DOUGLAS FIR SPARKLE’TINI where an actual tree branch is infused into the vodka!

or this tres cool recipe for an ALPINE MARTINI, again using real tree branches!

the saying, you can lead a horse to water but can’t make it drink, is certainly not true of the centaur. adding the half man onto the half horse turned this animal into quite the drunkard. sagittarius never needs a second invitation to accept a tipple. the ultimate party animal, at the core of their very being lies an unbridled gusto for all things fun, extravagent, and delicious. you know those sins… the seven deadly ones? well, this wild stallion has broken every one of em at least twice. sagg will take it to the limit–and beyond in any given category–all though drinking, eating and spending money seem to be favorites. makes me kinda upset i wasn’t born a sagittarius!

the chestnut is a sagittarius. see the real one above from my mum’s chestnut tree and a realistic imposter below from UNCOMMON GOODS. the perfect christmas gift the sagg in your life! ($350)

UNBRIDLED (CHOCOLATE CHESTNUT ALEXANDER)

1 1/4 oz chestnut-infused brandy*
1/2 oz dark creme de cacao
1 oz ORGANIC cream or soy creamer

cook chestnuts by boiling, steaming or roasting. peel shell and skin and chop coursely. place into 750 ml liters brandy and let sit in cool, dark place for one to three weeks. strain into final storage container.

HOW TO COOK CHESTNUTS VIA RECIPE SOURCE:

Roasting chestnuts is often a tradition during the holidays. Storage conditions have to be just right, not too dry and not too damp. In dry air, they dry out and lose quality. In warm, damp air, they mold. Store fresh chestnuts in the refrigerator in a plastic bag with a few ventilation holes punched in it. Chestnuts can be cooked by roasting, boiling or steaming. To roast over an open fire, use a long handled popcorn popper or chestnut roaster. To roast in an oven, try a temperature of 300 degrees Fahrenheit for about 15 minutes. Before roasting, puncture each nut once or twice with an icepick or a knife. If you fail to do this, pressure from steam building up inside the shells will cause the nuts to explode, either before or after they come out of the oven or roaster. To boil chestnuts, place them in a shallow pan with water that just covers them. Bring to a boil, reduce the heat and boil gently for 15 to 20 minutes. Drain and partially cool, then remove the kernels using a sharp tine of a table fork. The longer the nuts cook, the mealier the kernels become and tend to crumble when removed from the shells. For especially dry chestnuts, soak them overnight in water before boiling in fresh water. For steaming, carefully cut fresh, moist chestnuts in half and cook them in a vegetable steamer over boiling water for 8 to 10 minutes. Most kernels should fall out of the shells during cooking. Steamed or boiled nuts can be dipped in melted butter and salted, if desired, or used in other recipes. Store cooked chestnuts in tightly sealed jars in the refrigerator for a month or two or in the freezer for up to a year.

thanks to WHAT’S ON MY PLATE for hosting WEEKEND HERB BLOGGING #110.

the maple tree is thankfully ubiquitous in north america, as we enjoy our maple syrup very much. not that fake syrupy stuff, like aunt jemima, but the real deal, tapped from the trunks of sugar maple trees and boiled down on the stove to make the little piece of heaven we call maple syrup. ever have a maple syrup candy? if you haven’t, then you simply haven’t lived, either. in the fall when the trees shed their seeds in hopes of sewing a zillion little maple babies, the abundance of jupiter is blatantly obviously as the ground lay covered in a blanket of green seeds. now that’s proliferation, the jupiterian way. come spring, many of those will have all ready taken root, continuing the legacy of their far-reaching, and super self seeding, ruling planet.

SPICY PEACH TART:

2 oz brandy
1 1/2 oz maple syrup
3 oz fresh squeezed peach nectar
5 drops tabasco
maple leaf

add brandy, maple syrup, peach nectar and tabasco to ice filled shaker and shake vigorously for ten seconds. pour entire contents into lowball glass and garnish with a sugar maple leaf. (created by gwen sutherland kaiser)

special thanks to mark, who bravely climbed up a rickety ladder to grab my garnish, all the while shaking like a leaf!

(Cocktail created by Gwen Sutherland Kaiser)

I’m hot for blueberries right now – obviously. as i might have mentioned, these tasty little ubiquitous berries are ruled by the planet of Jupiter. This is due to their bountiful and seemingly endless nature. Pisces is co-ruled by Jupiter and Neptune. Where as, Sagittarius is ruled solely by Jupiter. To paint a blue picture for you, think about Elvis (sag rising) & anna nicole (sag sun). Gluttony, hedonism & expansion (ahem, waistline) were but a few of their Sagittarian qualites.

If there’s anything I could possibly hate about my favorite season, summer, it’s that everything is ripe all at once! arghhh… so little time, so much to pick. or buy, whatever. that’s why we have freezers, right? now if i could just learn how to use them! but back to blueberries… when it rains it pours. all spring and summer, i painstakingly watch those little balls go from a pale shade of green to pink to finally a deep blue hue. YES… FINALLY! what gives? weeks and weeks of no ripe berries, but then, one day they all decide to get ripe. together. blue ball overload! here’s the way to handle that girls…

BAD GIRL SMOOTHIE

yield: 2 drinks

1/2 c silken tofu
1/3 c honey
full tray of ice
tsp flax oil
2/3 c blueberries
4 oz vodka

throw it all in the blender at the same time and puree until ice is smooth. (created by gwen sutherland kaiser)

even the goodest girl has to be bad sometimes. well no time like the present, so go ahead girls, adulterate those hyper-healthy ingredients. and like it too. who’s to know your smoothie’s kickin? that’s your dirty little secret, you bad girl you. drink for breakfast and walk to work with a spring in your step. or, drink for dinner and have some really sweet dreams.

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