i never expected Intoxicated Zodiac to climb as high as it has in the blogosphere. this is pretty cool! many cheers to our faithful readers : )

ASCENSION is a book unlike any i’ve found in that it really goes into detail on each and every ascended master. for example, call me a caveman, but i was not aware that our statue of liberty was modeled on an ascended master! in this fascinating book, the author includes countless personal anecdotes–from being accosted by an angel posing as a trash collector, to being passed on the road by an ascended master cyclist–she’s got some luck!

unbeknownst to me, we new yorkers have our very own city protecter: the roman goddess, Libertas (laten for liberty), who is the embodiment of freedom. The author writes that while visiting mount shasta, she saw a vision of lady liberty hovering above manhattan pouring golden light on the city. so how cool is that? the big apple is a golden delicious… ironcially, that’s my favorite variety.

so to those of you wondering, what the hell is ascension? the author explains that “ascension means freedom. you can live anywhere and materialize anything. you can continue to serve on the earth plane or another plane. you can travel anywhere at the speed of thought and materialize your desires instantaneously.” pretty sweet, huh? the author goes on to ask “are you ready to live as an immortal being? after all, your higher self is as spiritual now as it will ever be, and you are as immortal today as you ever will be. your soul lives eternally. it is possible to become an ascended master right now.”

ASCENSION: Connecting with the Immortal Masters and Beings of Light, by Susan Shumsky $15.99

did you know that lilac flowers are edible? i didn’t until recently, and since my discovery i’ve have been patiently waiting for lilac season to roll around, so i could put this claim to the test. and guess what? it passed with flying colors, or pink and purple really… i didn’t die–lilacs are edible!

thanks to beautiful venus for giving the world yet another intoxicating flower. is there anything better on this earth than the smell of fresh lilac? c’mon now, before you all say: sex, chocolate, shopping or drugs…. admit that lilacs are pretty high up on the list!

i propose we all take a lesson from the zodiacal pleasure-monger, and make like a bull this may. taurus knows how to enjoy the small things in life, like fresh lilac. taurus reminds us to stop to smell the roses, and drink the lilacs too.

we all know i love flower tipples, and i’d order this in a bar, hands down, just for the sheer novelty of it. i’ve provided a pictoral guide of my lilac experience for your viewing pleasure below.

the lilac aroma is quite fragrant infused into the simple syrup, but when you mix it with the other cocktail ingredients, it somewhat loses the intensity of its scent. it’s still there, just harder to detect. but, very easy to drink!

the syrup actually turns out green. if you’re not into green, add some NATURAL food coloring, or throw a blueberry or two into the sauce pot while you’re cooking the syrup.

FRESH LILAC MARTINI:
1 part lilac syrup*
1 part vodka (feel free to use 2 oz vodka, but it will dilute the scent.)
1 part fresh squeezed lemon

shake over ice, strain into the prettiest glass you can find, and garnish with a lilac sprig. cheers!

LILAC SYRUP: equal parts lilac florets, water, sugar. simmer for 10 minutes. strain. chill.

i just stumbled upon the most adorable dating site, GEMINI AND SCORPIO.COM, created by Gemini (a sweet, bright, angelic creature) and Scorpio (an intense, dark and moody siren). whadda combo!

the NYC based site has some super cute (and pretty accurate) date scopes… check em out at GEMINIANDSCORPIO.COM

and hey, you might just meet mr/ms right while you’re there…

Spring is in full force now that I’ve trekked from the desert back across the continental divide. I’ve watched trees go from buds to fresh green leaf, plants from bulbs and shoots to full flower and animals grow amorous to the point of being somewhat careless with life and limb. With the exception of the suicidal animal tendencies, it is difficult NOT to feel inspired to do something of the same thing. Love is definitely in the air, and if you are a fellow allergy sufferer, it is also in your sinuses. It is the time of year that makes me grateful for the hairlessness of my cats.

Yes, cats, plural. We have a new addition here in the Silver Twinkie, and he is a very, very gregarious red-headed Libra with a Sagittarius Ascendant. We’ve named him Cesare.

He’s into absolutely everything, with all of his senses, and wants to get up close and personal with all things new, be they people, food or other sundry items found in the Airstream. He’ll make a toy out of anything at hand and never gives up trying to play with our resident Virgo, our dear, sweet Brundlefly.

To her credit, Brundlefly has been reasonably tolerant of the new addition to the family, not biting hard enough to leave marks and only hissing twice or three times per day. Her Scorpio Ascendant has puffed her up with jealousy, so I’m careful to give her all the loving to which she’s become accustomed, and then some. She’s so very much the embodiment of her sign right now that one feels very privileged when she comes and sits in one’s lap, even moreso if she then begins to purr.

Cesare is, of course, oblivious. He’s very, very busy figuring things out and just really doesn’t wish to be bothered until he’s done with whatever he’s investigating, playing with or sniffing to within an inch of its life. His new life is an endless series of amusing items to be befriended and won over and this includes Brundlefly, who, aside from us, is the center of his Universe. He loves her, wants to play with her, snuggles up to her when chilly or sleepy or simply feeling amorous in his neutered-male sort of way.

She, for her part, is quite clear that all of this activity this will take place on her terms and on her terms only. As I write this, the negotiations are ongoing.

The contrast in personalities is making me painfully aware of my own tendencies for a short temper and overly critical point of view. I watch Brundlefly growl and hiss and generally expend an enormous amount of energy on accentuating the negative points of the new addition. It makes the times she accepts his snuggling, or seeks him out for a snuggle during a mid-afternoon catnap marathon seem positively effortless and carefree. In turn, I examine my own habitual routines of doing just that, ignoring the beauty of the paradise about me, wherever we may happen to be, and instead concentrating on the one semi-annoying piece of news received in that week’s mail drop. More damaging still, I watch Best Beloved wilt with resignation as this ongoing cycle generates more negativity and less joy in the moments we share out here on the road.

It’s enough to make me come to this month’s column with a great big Mea Culpa and an apology for Best Beloved that I know won’t make up for anything in the long run. But Cesare, who is worming him way beneath my arm and shoulder at this very moment, has a lesson for me in all of this: Persistence in Positivity. No matter how many times I place him on the floor, he is back up on my keypad, purring, ready to engage and play. No matter how many times Brundlefly swats him away, he finds a different vantage point from which to stalk and pounce in an attempt to begin games anew. No matter how cold it gets at night he snuggles contentedly beside us both, a low rumble always in his chest. No matter how harshly we call his name to chide him for playing with the garbage r some other such nonsense, he responds with a raised tail, wide trusting eyes and a loud, steady purr.

In short, he is all joy, all the time. And I could do with his reminder to stick with my initial thoughts and impressions of the spring season, to follow his example of striving to find the positive in every moment, even if it is fleeting and rare, and greet my days and my Best Beloved with persistent affirmations of joy in the moment and with the company.

It is on this note, dear readers, that I give you a very simple and delicious recipe for a springtime cocktail that I have affectionately named the Cat Toy. Enjoy with someone you love who loves you back with an unconditional joy that reminds you to savor every moment of every beautiful day.

CAT TOY
1 part Triple Sec or Orange Cointreau
Splash of vanilla vodka
2 parts pineapple juice
1 part sour mix* (Make your own! MUCH better than purchased!)
1 part orange juice

I garnish this with a piece of fruit, an umbrella and a gummi worm, the combination of which truly resembles a moderately expensive cat toy.

*SOUR MIX: a mixture of 50% simple syrup (equal parts sugar/water) and 50% fresh squeezed clear citrus (lemon or lime)

Enjoy!

Cheers~Charon, The Most Dangerous Beauty Alive
theswordswallowers.com
oddangel.com

Charon Henning is one of a handful of female sword swallowers in the world today. She’s performed on carnival midways and at wine tastings, on theater stages and grassy lots.

Charon also reads tea leaves professionally, a skill she inherited from her grandmother on her mother’s side of the family. Tea-leaf reading is a wonderful and elegant form of entertainment, suitable for many time periods and venues.

Charon loves being on the road seeing new places and meeting new people. Want to catch Charon on the road for her live show? View her tour schedule here. Or, book Charon’s talent for your next event!

i love bees. while they might fly around like mad little geminis, i believe they are truly capricornian in nature. as a goat myself, perhaps that is where my fondness for them stems. their byproduct, honey, is ruled by venus and is therefore a libra or taurus. so now that we’ve got the zodiac angle covered, let’s talk about honey, bees, and booze…

barenjager honey liqueur is like spiked honey, straight from the hive. and i would know, as i was lucky enough to eat it straight from the hive when i was a kid. yup, i grew up surrounded by bee hives; my parents were apiarists. the bees were harmless—i used to actually pet their fuzzy backs, just to prove they were.

the downside to having 20 beehives in your backyard of course, was getting stung on a semi regular basis. because the lawn was perpetually blooming with some sort of wildflower—be it clover, buttercup, dandelion, you name it—the bees were constantly landing on the lawn to gather pollen. and because the lawn was our barefooted playground, standing on an unlucky bee a few times a year—and getting stung—was unavoidable. please note that the bees would never, EVER sting out of hostility. even if a—new to the world of bees—friend happened to swat at them. they would fly away, not looking for a fight. all they wanted was a queen to worship, a hive to call home, and flowers to pollinate.

did you know that when a bee does sting, it is a suicidal act for them? the bottom half of its body is left along with the stinger—so they think twice before pulling the trigger. bees aren’t sting happy, because they aren’t anxious to die. this is not the case with hornets or yellow jackets, who tend to give honey bees a bad name due to mistaken identity. those ill-tempered imposters can sting over and over again—and not produce an ounce of honey. of course with the new africanized killer honey bee around now, it’s a whole new ball game… all the money honey in the world wouldn’t convince me to pet one of those angry insects. luckily we don’t have to contend with them up north.

which brings us back again to this delectable substance, barenjager honey liqueur. barenjager translated from german means “bear hunter,” which is what hunters used to lure the bears with. i could do without the cruel and antiquated logo on the bottle’s label. and as cute as the plastic bee hive-shaped cap is, it is not recyclable, which is a problem. other than that the packaging is a really cute basket weave type of thing, and after all, it’s the taste that counts. and the taste is WOW, SWEET AS HONEY!

BARENJAGER HONEY, $28.00+

Change and Resistance: Uranus and Saturn Face Off

One rushes on stage with new concepts and shocking evolution while the other clings to the status quo and suppresses rash behavior. The last time they played together Americans elected the first African American president while a “mavericky” woman and her old-school running mate kept things strange. It’s not surprising our president is a liberal thinker (Uranus) who is forced to work within old structures (Saturn).

Now they’re back. What do they have in store for us? It was 45 years ago, in and around 1965, when these two last danced. We know what happened then: civil unrest, riots, burning bras, drug use, war resistance, assassinations, free sex, and liberation of people in ways we hadn’t seen before. What will these two bring this time, especially when Pluto, who is hanging around behind the curtain, comes on stage this summer to add his part?

When the idea for change comes from within ourselves, we usually like it. It is inspiring. But when change comes in as an independent with a mind of its own (Uranus) it can seem like a rebellious teenager. Just when we think things are calm it sulks around, keeps us awake at night, and makes us want to gain greater control.

Wise souls among us know that change is all we can truly depend on. We can’t escape it, though we try, and in many cases we must let it be. Mostly we try to avoid change because we have no idea what is in the future and we really don’t want to alter our world view. We decide it is best to keep things as they are, or how they used to be (Saturn). Plus, we don’t want to experience the feelings of loss (Pluto) that often accompany change. What if we terribly miss what we had?

(image) The idea of change, and change itself, brings up unnecessary fear which then causes unwarranted stress on the body and mind. One of our tasks as human beings is to overcome fear, especially the useless fears that pervade our modern lives. I see fear restricting the body, mind, and spirit, shrinking one’s life experience into an uncomfortable little box. It takes our minds to dark narrow places where we lose a broader, more balanced perspective.

We have the unknown future in front of us, unpredictable circumstances will occur, our country and its people will do or say things we don’t like. We can either grow our fear or live every moment as if it were sacred, remembering that even the most unusual of circumstances can be profoundly healing and enriching, bringing in higher wisdom and understanding.

One way to overcome fear is to develop a sense of trust and faith in something greater than yourself, such as a belief that there is something beyond the ordinary mundane life. World religions and philosophies have sought to provide this for people, but many of them have fallen short of actually teaching a person how to be free from useless fears. The responsibility is on each individual.

One way to reduce fear rather than expand it is simply to become aware of it, knowing that the wiser path welcomes change, accepts the inevitable, and chooses not to fear it. By becoming aware of our habitual reactions to the unknown future, by acknowledging our resistance to the feelings loss brings, by being aware of the times when someone says something that refutes our world view and ignites our own fears, we can approach life in a more balanced way.

When we try to keep our lives, surroundings, and viewpoints the same, Uranus and Pluto will surely come along to roll them around a bit, and thankfully so. Do we really want to live a life so thin and safe that there is no new experience, expansion, or advancement of the mind and spirit? In these rapidly changing times, which are just gaining momentum, the more we can flow with change and allow our minds to be free, the better off we will be. Perhaps in the process, we can grow calmer, wiser, more mature, and more peaceful. Cheers, Christina

a note from gwen: i’m proud to bear the middle name of sutherland, which is the family crest of SANS PEUR (without fear.) this motto relates so well to christina’s article that i just had to include it! that the mascot is a wild cat, makes me like this logo all the more… just remember everyone, FEAR is an acronym for “False Evidence Appearing Real.” this valuable snippet of information was channeled from ascended master, HILARION.

if you’re brave enough to try some classic cocktails, these two would be an honorable place to start:

ROB ROY (courageous scottish hero who gwen’s related to way back)
1.5 oz Scotch
0.5 oz sweet Vermouth
Fill a mixing glass with cracked ice. Add Scotch and sweet vermouth. Stir and strain into a chilled cocktail glass. Garnish with a cherry.

TRINITY (sexy, fearless heroine of the gwen’s favorite movie, the matrix.)
3/4 oz dry vermouth
3/4 oz sweet vermouth
3/4 oz gin
Stir all ingredients with ice, strain into a cocktail glass, and serve.

Dr. Christina Grant is a holistic healer and spiritual counselor who uses astrology in her work to help people better understand their purpose and life circumstances. She works in person and by phone. She has helped hundreds of people attain physical, mental, emotional and spiritual well-being through personal transformation. Her writing is published nationwide. To learn more, see WWW.CHRISTINAGRANT.COM

an alcoholic bird—a blue jay to be precise—saves the day in this off colour comedy featuring a highly personified animal film crew. author kevin shamel’s impressive imagination conjures up the likes of shittin’ rats, zombie cats, drunk birds, horny rats, masochistic pigs, evil dogs, and cinematographic chickens. all in one book. with the exception of the few non-evil critters who finally manage to save the day–and the one token innocent human–every creature in this book is a rotten little animal. this book is not for the faint of heart, but for those who appreciate a touch of dark humor and the fact that animals are much more like people than anyone realizes. i highly recommend this book—i was glued to the pages from start to finish. ROTTEN LITTLE ANIMALS $9.95