well, if you’re into chain letters, i got a good one for ya! my friend elaine sent me a chain letter, which i normally don’t open because i know what it is. however, the subject line caught my eye… it was a zodiac chain letter! and only because it was astrology, did i forward it on to the people who chain mail me every other day. (not naming names, anthony.) dear readers, feel free to forward this to the enemies on your contact list. and do stay posted to see if i got my promised one minute of good luck.

SUBJECT: CAPRICORN

FORWARD:
“It was interesting. Cris Angel showed how this worked on one of his shows, but it was still kind of surprising when I checked out several people I knew. Not superstitious, but I need all the luck I can get. Once you have opened this e-mail, there is no turning back. Below are true descriptions of zodiac signs. Read your sign and then forward it on, with your zodiac sign on the subject line. This is the real deal, try ignoring or changing it and the first thing you’ll notice is having a horrible day, starting tomorrow morning – and it only gets worse from there..”

CAPRICORN – The Go-Getter (Dec 22 – Jan 19) Patient and wise. Practical and rigid. Ambitious. Tends to be Good-looking. Humorous and funny. Can be a bit shy (? usually not Cap’s are usually straight forward and do not tolerate insubordination especially by friends and reserved. Often pessimistic. Capricorns tend to act before they think, and can be VERY Unfriendly at times. Hold grudges, you bet especially on those that don’t own up. Like competition.. Get what they want. 20 years of good luck if you forward.
AQUARIUS – The Sweetheart (Jan 20 – Feb 18) Optimistic and honest. Sweet personality. Very independent. Inventive and intelligent. Friendly and loyal. Can seem unemotional. Can be a bit rebellious. Very stubborn, but original and unique. Attractive on the inside and out. Eccentric personality. 11 years of luck if you forward.
PISCES – The Dreamer (Feb 19 – Mar 20) Generous, kind, and thoughtful. Very creative and im aginative. May become secretive and vague. Sensitive… Don’t like details. Dreamy and unrealistic. Sympathetic and loving. Kind. Unselfish. Good kisser. Beautiful. 8 years of good luck if you forward.
ARIES – The Daredevil (Mar 21 – April 19) Energetic. Adventurous and spontaneous. Confident and enthusiastic. Fun. Loves a challenge. EXTREMELY impatient. Sometimes selfish. Short fuse. (Easily angered..) Lively, passionate, and sharp wit.. Outgoing. Lose interest quickly – easily bored Egotistical. Courageous and assertive. Tends to be physical and athletic. 16 years of good luck if you forward.
TAURUS – T he Enduring One (April 20 – May 20) Charming but aggressive… Can come off as boring, but they are not. Hard workers. Warm-hearted. Strong, has endurance. Solid beings that are stable and secure in their ways. Not looking for shortcuts. Take pride in their beauty. Patient and reliable.. Make great friends and give good advice. Loving and kind. Loves hard – passionate. Express themselves emotionally. Prone to ferocious temper-tantrums. Determined. Indulge themselves often. Very generous. 12 years of good Luck if you forward
GEMINI – The Chatterbox (May 21 – June 20) Smart and witty. Outgoing, very chatty. Lively, energetic. Adaptable but needs to express them selves. Argumentative and outspoken. Like change. Versatile Busy, sometimes nervous and tense. Gossips. May seem superficial or inconsistent. Beautiful physically and mentally. 5 years of bad luck if you do not forward.
CANCER – The Protector (June 21 – July 22) Moody, emotional. May be shy. Very loving and caring.. Pretty/handsome. Excellent partners for life. Protective. Inventive and imaginative. Cautious. Touchy-feely kind of person. Needs love from others.. Easily hurt, but sympathetic. 16 years of bad luck if you do not forward.
LEO – The Boss (July 23 – Au g 22) Very organized. Need order in their lives – like being in control. Like boundaries. Tend to take over everything. Bossy. Like to help Others. Social and outgoing. Extroverted. Generous, warm-hearted. Sensitive. Creative energy. Full of themselves. Loving. Doing the right thing is important to Leos. Attractive. 13 years of bad luck if you do not forward.
VIRGO – The Perfectionist (Aug 23 – Sept 22) Dominant In relationships. Conservative. Always wants the last word. Argumentative.. Worries. Very smart. Dislikes noise and chaos. Eager. Hardworking. Loyal.. Beautiful… Easy to talk to. Hard to please. Harsh. Practical and very fussy. Often shy. Pessimistic. 7 years of bad luck if you do not forward.
LIBRA – The Harmonizer (Sept 23 – O ct 22) Nice to everyone they meet. Can’t make up their mind .. Have own unique appeal. Creative, energetic, and very social. Hates to be alone. Peaceful, generous. Very loving and beautiful. Flirtatious. Give in too easily. Procrastinators. Very gullible. 9 years of bad luck if you do not forward.
SCORPIO – The Intense One (Oct 23 – Nov 21) Very energetic. Intelligent. Can be jealous and/or possessive. Hardworking. Great kisser. Can become obsessive or secretive. Holds grudges. Attractive.. Determined. Loves being in long Relationships. Talkative. Romantic. Can be self-centered at times. Passionate and Emotional. 4 years of bad luck if you do not forward.
SAGITTARIUS – The Happy-Go-Lucky One (Nov 22 – Dec 21) Good-natured optimist… Doesn’t want to grow up (Peter Pan Syndrome). Indulges self. Boastful. Likes luxuries and gambling. Social and outgoing. Doesn’t like responsibilities. Often fantasizes. Impatient. Fun to be around. Having lots of friends Flirtatious. Doesn’t like rules. Sometimes hypocritical. Dislikes being confined – tight spaces or even tight clothes. Doesn’t like being doubted. Beautiful inside and out

Send away!!~ Ready, set , go!
1-3 people= 1 minute of luck
4-7 people= 1 hour of luck
8-12 people = 1 day of luck
13-17 People = 1 week of luck
18-22 people = 1 month of luck
23-27 people = 3 Months of luck
28-32 people = 7 months of luck

In a culmination of 30 years of research, homeopathic scientist professor valery sorokin has patented an 11-day process that “structures” vodka. she christened the born again spirit, “OVAL.” The structuring process combines water and alcohol in a way that is different than every other vodka–it arranges the vodka so that the water surrounds the spirit. The result… water prepares your palate for a uniquely smooth taste experience. as i wrote in one of my earlier posts, it’s been proven that water can be “restructured,”so why not vodka too?

I must say, this vodka is REALLY good… it has a pleasantly sweet start rounded out with a subtle nutty flavor. and still more interesting, is the strange three sided bottle that OVAL comes packaged in. personally, i’m going to upcycle it into a three sided picture frame and bud vase. but that’s me. ($40, Imported from Austria)

Visit OVAL VODKA

Martini & Rossi is celebrating the launch of their Sparkling Rosé by hosting a Rosé Spa Sweepstakes. The grand prize winner will receive a 3 day, 2 night trip for themselves and three guests to a leading hotel and spa in New York City. With an estimated retail value of $8,000 and no purchase necessary, you have nothing to lose and the chance to gain a relaxing vaca in the big appletini! Ya gotta be in it to win it… enter at MartiniRose.com. cheers!

woo hoo!!! intoxicated zodiac, the blog, came in 14th place in the world’s top 25 astrology blogs. check out my super shiny number 14 spot below, or visit INVESP here for the complete ranking.

Intoxicated Zodiac’s Print Press:

Last month, I was invited to attend Junior merino’s cocktail lab in new york. What an experience! The hungriest child in the biggest candy store could not possible have felt the glee I experienced upon entering junior’s riverdale office. Shelf after shelf was lined bottles of standard, exotic and homemade cocktail ingredients. There were the usual suspects present: club liquors (hypnotic and the like), and your absolut vodkas and such, but then the selection became more obscure until finally my eyes settled on bottles i knew i’d never seen before. And that was junior’s private collection of spirits unavailable for purchase in the united states, which he generously allowed us to sample. One of the highlights of the day for me personally was that I finally got to taste the new Crème Yvette, from the makers of the famed St. Germain. The verdict: it was good, especially in comparison to the slew of recently revived violet liqueurs out there. But it was no st. germain!

We started off the lab with a blind tasting of the event sponsors and their competition, of which we had several throughout the course of the intensely packed day. The sponsors were combier (an exquisitely delicious alternative to Cointreau, distilled right down the street, and the original orange liqueur as it turns out), Canton Ginger Liqueur (another of my favorite liqueurs on this earth), Castries Peanut Rum Liqueur (a tasty and interesting alternative to Bailey’s, it does contain condensed milk. Since it’s made in st. lucia, however, at least the dairy is rBGH.3–free), Russian Standard Vodka and Russian Platinum Vodka (very smooth and certainly worth a try if you get the chance), Siembra Azul Tequilas (which ranged from light and fruity to rich and oaky), and Gvine Gin (a nice, easy to drink, refreshing spirit made from juniper and ugni blanc grapes).

We were then presented with a breakfast cocktail consisting of cornflakes, bananas, Castries, maple syrup and kahlua. it made for a rather tasty and wholesome (wink wink) way to start the day.

Breakfast segwayed into the fun part: creating cocktails! We were all instructed to come up with 8 different cocktails, recording the ingredients and proportions for the intent of duplication. We were then to sample each other’s masterpieces and try not to get wasted. If any of us were actually intoxicated, then it was surely from overwhelming indecision. The quandary: How to choose a few select ingredients from hundreds of ridiculously interesting options? Not an easy decision to make! But the troopers we were–somehow we managed to pull it off…

I myself stood frozen by the prospect of 12 different flower waters. I finally settled on the obscure nettle flower water, and left the orange flower water, rose flower water, banana flower water, violet flower water, lavender flower water, chamomile flower water, cinnamon flower water and vine flower water on the shelf. Wow. If you’ve read my blog at any length you’ll know how partial I am to floral libations.

For my next cocktail I chose from tray after tray of fresh herbs, fruits and vegetables. The selection ranged from pear cactus to key limes to purple tomatoes to star fruit to watercress to corn. The list was endless and I somehow narrowed it down the lychee nut, which I’d never seen outside of a can. Next, I chose what is called a Sechuan button, and isn’t yet available to the general public in the USA. Junior likened its taste to a putting your tongue on a battery, and he wasn’t far off. While this Chinese import sounded dubious, I used it anyway and created one of my most fabulous cocktails of the day.

Thankfully, lunch arrived and we were given the chance to soak up some of that alcohol. Which was funny, because as it turned out, lunch was actually soaked in alcohol. Junior (gemini) and his lovely wife and partner Heidi (virgo), had graciously taken the opportunity to dazzle us with their culinary expertise. Plate after plate of gourmet concoctions were presented to us, each containing at least one liquor. For example, the shrimp lobster salad was made with St. Germain, Russian Standard Vodka, wood honey and passion fruit. I don’t eat fish, but from the looks on the faces around me it was apparently to die for.

Towards the end of the day Junior led a demonstration on molecular mixology. He started with cocktail caviar (a calcium solution with algae, tonic water, citrus and pomegranate). This was great because not only as it was vegan, but it looked astoundingly similar to real caviar! Keep in mind that agar agar, alginate, kappa and algae all provide viable non-animal alternatives to gelatin. Junior went on to show us how to make liquid nitrogen cocktails, which end up being kind of slushy-like. If you over do the nitrogen, however, then you get space food cocktails (sort of freeze-dried margarita lumps if you will). There was a cotton candy machine I would have loved to test out, but unfortunately we didn’t have the powdered alcohol it required at the moment. Alcoholic cotton candy–now this was a good use of that strange powered alcohol only available in Europe! Up until now, I had cared less that we couldn’t get it over here. Who knew that you could just add some sugar and voila–alcoholic cotton candy! Lastly, I explored the fruits of the food hydrator… dried star fruit, apples, and oranges to be exact. All of which would add a decidedly sophisticated element to any cocktail as garnish.

I knew Junior from my days as a mixologist for CocktailTimes.com. He has always been kind, energetic, optimistic and informed. But what I didn’t know about Junior, is that he has a travelling bartending school in Mexico in the form of an 18 wheeler bus! The vehicle has 20 seats and a full bar. Now that is too cool for school.

I was aware of Junior’s line of cockail ingredients, but I didn’t know that they were available to industry only. If you own a bar or restaurant you need to investigate The Liquid Chef line, ranging from muddlers to foams to syrups. Each product is well thought out and of the highest quality. We were lucky enough to get some of them in the giant gift bag we walked away with : ) Contact junior for more info.

Thanks to Junior, Heidi, and all the sponsoring brands for allowing me this unparalled libational opportunity… cheers! If you are interested in being considered for a spot at these sessions, please call 646.418.0655 or email heidi@theliquidchefinc.com.

if you’ve read this blog for any length of time you’ll know that i’m fond of all animals, especially the horse. as far as i’m concerned few beasts rival this one in its surpreme grace, innate beauty, and placid innocence. but in our society, career options are slim for the magestic creature we humans domesticated so long ago. so, it is groups like this that are so dear to my heart, because they unite an animal sorely in need of a job, and a human sorely in need of love and support.

as you might have heard, keeping a horse doesn’t come cheap. CENTAUR STRIDE pays $3000 annually just to feed, board, and care for a therapy horse! in light of that, won’t you please consider attending CENTAUR STRIDE’S charity event? famed mixologists erin williams and junior merino will be there doing what they do best: mixing and mingling! join them in wine tasting, food sampling, visiting the horses, and enjoying a fine weekend in the country!

visit CENTAUR STRIDE’S benefit here…

(and in case you’re wondering what is going on with this bizarre photo… it is of me, sitting on count, my friend’s gelding. we are posing for the sagittarius wallpaper that my friend mary so kindly photographed… cheers!)

i’m so exited i can hardly contain myself… yours truly is now writing a printed column! like, on real paper. from trees. (sorry planet)

every month you can catch “ZODIAC COCKTAILING WITH GWEN” in the new MOD MAGAZINE out of florida (from st. petersburg to sarasota to be exact). so be sure to pick up a copy if you live in that area, and if you don’t, no worries—you can peruse the first issue online at the MOD MAGAZINE website.

cocktail culture magazines seem to be the new “it-niche” and i am glad to be part of it! check out these other fine drinking publications:

IMBIBE out of portland, DRINK ME out of san fransisco, and it has been brought to my attention that there are two brand new international cocktail magazines. one is based in london and the other is based in paris. i wish i could get more info on them. anyone?