dentristy is a questionable profession for libra. capricorn, who rules the teeth along with saturn, is much better suited. Libra’s make excellent trophy wives, flirtatious diplomats, solid sex workers. but, dentists, not so much. as i lay helplessly in her big vinyl chair, drooling all over myself, my hygienist informed me that she’s really in the wrong field. oh you don’t say, i thought to myself… she went on to inform me that she’d heard, as a libra, she should have been a prostitute. oh really, i raised my eyebrow… i wondered what we doing here then. shouldn’t she be on a corner somewhere? or in a swanky hotel room? or in some diplomat’s pied-à-terre… massaging something other than a set of gums? She then admitted that, unlike her Libran sister, who would’ve been a wonderful whore because boy is she a slut, turning tricks just wasn’t her thing! well men, i breathed a sigh of relief for you. and as i tasted the blood enter my mouth, i thought – with hands like these, it’s a good thing she missed her call girl calling. i nodded sympathetically and humorously in agreement, thanking god i had another six months before having to undergo the hooking hygienist’s tool again.

which brings me to my latest revelation: holistic dentistry! yes, i finally grew tired of having my mouth raped by the scalpel metal picky thing and ventured out into territory unknown… i wish i’d done it sooner! enter sandra senzon, holistic intergrative dental professional and published author. aptly dubbed the tooth fairy, sandra (a Leo) performed magic on my mouth. here’s the thing… i underwent the cosmetic whitening treatment at BRITE SMILE and now my teeth were falling out of my mouth. minor detail. the extreme ultra violet bleaching method that BRITE SMILE used had caused my gums to recede, and now drinking (HORROR), eating, smiling and brushing were torturous. in the comfort of her chrysler building office with panoramic views of new york city, sandra sprayed her proprietary blend of CAMELIA OIL on my teeth. she then went in and did a thorough cleaning, which i hardly felt at all! MAGIC. this natural oil had done what nothing else had been able to do – stop my pain. i departed with a bottle, along with sandra’s book, REVERSING GUM DISEASE NATURALLY. So impressed was i, that i have made Sandra’s products AVAILABLE FOR PURCHASE.

camelia oil isn’t just for numbing tooth pain naturally. it’s also a great way to whiten teeth safely, without employing harsh bleaching chemicals used by every other tooth whitening product on the market today. it also contains anti-oxidant properties and repels plaque.

sandra discovered camelia oil’s whitening properties while researching the essential oil lavender. traditionally used in skin care, she made the connection between our skin and the skin of our teeth – our gums. since then, she has developed and sold over 8,000 bottles to her tooth spa clients in the flavors of lavender (gemini & virgo), eucalyptus (leo) and peppermint (taurus & libra).
a visit to the TOOTH SPA is not your typical dentist appointment. for starters, you’ll find only essential oils and natural products, like the echinacea toothpaste – which BTW is completely non-abrasive and 100% edible – unlike conventional brands. but the best is that antique salt trays are used as receptacles – how cool! sandra also studies canine meridian relationships in diagnosing your toothy problem. i had no idea that each tooth is related to a different parts of the body, not unlike acupuncture and reflexology.

“Every organ and every part of your body is directly linked to a specific tooth or area of the mouth via these meridians, or energy highways. This connection is so strong that a biological dentist can often accurately guess your dental history simply by reviewing your physical symptoms.”

some other things i learned in my quest for healthy teeth: 1) hydrosonic cleaning is no better than the old fashioned dental pick and axe. they both scrape valuable enamel off your teeth. 2) silver/mercury fillings are bad. replace them if you can, but do it slowly, one at a time and only when you are in peak physical condition. taking them out too fast can create many physical problems. 3) drink light colored cocktails for whiter teeth. duh! mojito anyone?